Planning Birthdays After a Divorce

When you’re a parent, celebrating your children’s birthdays are always something to look forward to, especially when they are still young. However, this could prove challenging when the parent couple gets a divorce. 

A parent may become uncomfortable if they have to be around their ex-spouse or even their family. If the couple never seems to see eye-to-eye, throwing a birthday bash for the child may prove extremely difficult to achieve, at least peacefully. Co-parents also pose a problem as they have to put their needs before their own to throw a happy celebration successfully. 

What is a Parenting Plan?

While the divorce is still in process, parents need to agree that facilitates parenting for them. These plans help them take care of their children without unwanted tension between the couple. When these plans are being made, birthdays and holidays are planned out as well. Once being created, both parents must discuss what they want and expect out of the plan. They must also discuss potential issues to agree on workarounds. 

Is it a Good Idea to Throw a Birthday Bash with My Ex-Spouse

Our experts suggest that for divorced families, it’s a good idea to try to avoid throwing multiple birthday parties for a child. The first reason being, the child may feel uncomfortable celebrating their birthdays on different days. Another reason is that the child might find themselves emotionally overtaken when celebrating these events. They may feel like they should be reacting differently to both celebrations, almost like they need to choose aside. 

Divorce parents should put the needs of their children first. Having both parents at the same birthday party will show support to their child; ultimately, it’s best for them. In essence, birthdays are a celebration dedicated to only one person, meaning parents should put aside their differences during this time. It’s critical to get this step correct as soon as possible. This will make all other celebrations and events more comfortable to spend together.

Things Divorced Parents Should Keep In Mind

Parenting Plans: Both parents should be sticking to the parenting plan developed during the divorce proceedings. The program is supposed to be an agreement for a reason, commit to the decisions you have placed with your ex-spouse. 

Cost: The expense of the child’s celebration should be split evenly between both parents. A good idea to think about is splitting the cost of gifts; that way, a parent does not spend more than another, then, in turn, feels like things are not fair. 

Tension: There should be no conflict, arguments, or fights, as it will ruin the day for the child. 

Child: Before anything is solidified, check to see if that is what the child wants. A child may just want to spend their special day with a small gathering of friends, maybe just having a movie night. It’s easy for children with divorced parents to feel excluded from important decisions like these. Show them the support they need and include them. 

Both parents need to be civilized during these events. It’s for the child, not for them. They should focus on their children instead of their personal feelings. If it’s not possible for both parents to compromise or agree, it may be a good idea to switch on years to celebrate.  

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